At least once a month someone asks me to help her or him choose a bottle of perfume. Since people probably know by now that you, too, like fragrance, you’ve most likely been in the same boat. Our friends may think we can lead them to a department store, pluck the five or ten “best” bottles from the shelves for them to test, and they will walk away an hour later with their signature scent. If only it were that easy.

Over time, I’ve developed a system for helping people find a perfume. I’m offering it up here for your use, and I welcome suggestions for improvement.

When someone asks me to help her find a scent, I first ask her what kind of fragrances she likes. (To keep pronouns simple, I’ll assume that the perfume-seeker is a woman.) Usually she will tell me what she doesn’t like — patchouli, for instance, or powdery scents. Then, I ignore what she says. I am, however, careful to avoid these hot-button words when offering up fragrances to try…

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